This post is brought to you by elc International School.

Most parents want their children to do well at school but are also aware that it’s vital that they foster a positive spirit of enjoyment at the same time. There’s no question that success does require hard work, but it doesn’t have to mean that it is accompanied by fear of failure, long study hours, or an unbalanced life style. In fact these things often spell the opposite of success in the long run.

Instead, there are ways of motivating your child to succeed by working hard and also have an enjoyable life in the process. By doing this you set them up not only for success in exams but also in life – as most jobs now require people to be well-rounded, fit, and resilient.

Rajan Kaloo, Director of Services at elc International School in KL, thinks it’s important that parents and teachers, as well as the broader society, all work together on this important issue and having asked the senior teachers of elc International School for their advice, he has come up with five easy-to-practise ways to motivate your child.

1. Take an Interest in Them

“Students don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Mrs. Wahab, Head of Upper Primary at Sungai Buloh Campus, elc International School

Old-style parenting and teaching often meant that areas where children were strong were ignored and blame was focused on the things they did less well. But try a more supportive approach with your children.  Acknowledge their strengths and praise them for achievements, but at the same time provide help in areas where they are less strong. Tell them that it is natural that they should have strengths and weaknesses and that everybody does. Share with them the truth that the only person you are really in competition with is yourself – you do better by doing better than you did.

2. Provide the Right Rewards

“There is really no shortcut to success.  It requires consistent efforts, determination, and hard work.” Mrs. Chong, Head of Secondary at Sungai Buloh Campus, elc International School

Sometimes, as parents, in the hope of encouraging them to do well, we bribe our children with the latest gadgets just because their peers have them, but this isn’t usually very effective. If you feel the need for such rewards, then it is better to tie such gifts into an agreed programme of achievement. But it is very important that you negotiate the goals with them. Ask them what they want to achieve and what reward they want. Make an agreement, write it down, and get both parties to sign it. Most children will happily work towards something they really want.

But, be prepared to think out of the box when it comes to rewards. Experiences are often more important than material goods. After all, in twenty years will you remember the current “must have” or will you remember a magical family trip taken to a place that you really wanted to visit? However, that said, it is important to recognise that such bribes must eventually be removed. They cannot become crutches upon which future success will depend.  It is vital that, over time, children come to realise that there is no short-cut to success. There must be the development of a work ethic and the clear understanding that success comes as a result of effort, determination and hard work. This understanding will be their greatest rewards.

3. Give Encouragement

“Sandwich every bit of criticism with two layers of praise.” Ms. Kothai, Head of Secondary at Cyberjaya Campus, elc International School

Encouragement given at the right time can be life-changing. Many teachers know this and they sometimes wisely praise “ahead of the fact”. Through encouragement – and the word literally means to give courage – we often find the strength to succeed. We all need people to believe in us and this motivates us to do our best. Far from making people lazy, encouragement at the right time can have startling results. So start praising your child for what they do well – and what you believe they can do well. We work so much more effectively and enjoyably when we are calm rather than when we are anxious or stressed.

4. Treat Failure as “Falling Forward”

“Winning is not the most important thing. The goal is to do your very best, to improve, and to always strive for excellence.”  Rajan Kaloo, Director of Services at elc International School

Modern management gurus see failure as “falling forward”. They know that failure is often an essential pre-requisite for success. That’s why they call it falling forward. True you fall down, but you are still ahead of where you would have been had you not tried. If someone never fails, or falls forward, it means that they have never left their comfort zone and the results they produce will never be outstanding, just ordinary. So never blame your child for failing, just ask what they can do better next time and help them to do it.

5. Instil Good Life Habits as Early as You Can

“Good habits are learned through discipline and example, so do not teach through your mind, but rather through example.”  Ms. Carla, Head of Primary at Cyberjaya Campus, elc International School

Successful people have habits that they practise on a daily basis. One way you can really help your child do well is to emphasise the importance of making your work/life balance a daily habit. This means that you show them how to plan their day with healthy segments of work, exercise, and play. Some days may have to contain much larger elements of work, particularly when important exams are coming up. However, show them that exercise, which could be a walk or a swim, or just kicking a ball around with a friend, is an important part of every person’s life.

Likewise, we all need interaction with friends and family as part of the day. So, for example, start enjoying family meals together, talk, communicate, and lose the electronic devices momentarily.  Good relationships create emotional resilience which are essential for success. By creating positive habits, your children will develop self-confidence, work harder and find it easier and more enjoyable to do so.  But above all, success will be within their grasp.

Learn about elc International School here.